Getting in line....

Since we're making requests of the universe:

I'd like to stop being neurotic. Please.

I'd like the winning lotto ticket too, but I'll settle for the first.

I'd also like a trimmer waistline (or waste line as the case may be), but I'm figuring on having to take care of that myself.

Regular sex might not be too far off the charts either, but I'm pretty sure I'll get a mold of the perfect cock someday... until then BOB XV will do.

I'm afraid I have nothing to offer in trade except the knowledge that you will have saved those around me a smidgeon of sanity.

Quote

"Memory is a wonderful thing if you don't have to deal with the past"

-Movie "Before Sunset"

Listening to it on YouTube while at work.

Hash Cruise

I may be going on the hash cruise this year. Mah Hunnay wants to go, all I need to do, is come up with $2500 and I can swing it.

Hey Universe, I want you to consider this my official request for you to bring me $2500 in cash. I need you to hurry it up since the deadline is fast approaching.

While I'm asking you for things, how about you throw in another $7500 so I can pay off some debts, fix my car, get a new passport and some other things.

You know what, why be bashful, just make it an even $25,000 and I'll call it good. For now. Oh yeah, did I mention I need all that by July 1st?

Thanks!

Got Talent?

Well my man does. My mom gave me some pictures that needed to be retouched. He happened to pick the following picture to work on first. And guess where my mom is this week? Taking care of the women in the picture. She is my step dad's mom and is 98 years old.

Here is the comments my mom sent back to Shawn when he sent her the picture back.

I showed the picture to Greg's mom. Here is a little history, The 48 Ford in the drive was a Christmas gift, it was in the showroom window around $3000.00 new, this was an expensive car at that time.
She remembered the dress because she made it. The place is Beverly Drive in Charlotte North Carolina. It was Easter, She became pregnant two months later.
The boys were almost 5 and almost 4. She was almost 38 years old.
This made several large smiles on an old ladies face,
Thanks so much

Before

After

Response to last post

Maybe the "nonessential" body parts should be cut off. That would be a good way to really find out how nonessential they really are.

Jealous

Wish I had come up with this crap - some of the greatest excuses ever:

I thought we had agreed to disagree (about having sex with other people).

I was drunk and I don't remember it, you must have dreamt it.

AND the latest:

It was a nonessential body part.

New car

I need to get one. I am pretty sure that Kirsten is going to live with us until she graduates high school and having 6 people with a car that only seats 5 is not working. Have you priced a car? these things are expensive! sigh, at least I know what to do with the money I make at Chon Som now.

Ouch

I wonder, do old pains every really go away....

Or, do we sweep them under the rug like a giant elephant and walk around them pretending they aren't there?

Creative landscaping sucks. Eventually that elephant will trip you. Glad I've learned how to fall without breaking bones.

The Experiment

Funny how one little act can really make you question everything about ... well... everything.

And so there I was wondering, and perhaps feeling somewhat rueful and tossed away - yet again (and this time, my own fault, fool me twice...), and decided to check whether it is exactly as I think it is or if I'm perhaps a little neurotic and overwork things in my head... Of course that could be true anyway.

And it went something like this: For the entire week I didn't call anyone or do anything which might alert someone to my presence - exception, I did call one person as I deemed it necessary to wish a happy birthday, and got a text back that he didn't want to talk - and my phone and email were silent. SILENT. No one even called to wish my son a happy birthday.

And there you have it: I could completely skip the grid and no one would notice. Time to find some new 'friends'.

FML.

Neighbors

Why is it the neighbors that are most afraid are always right where you have to walk your dog. Like standing right in the walkway next to your door.


"Are you going to stand there or do I have to walk him around" that seemed to move him. People are always in the way. I so need a house. UGH

Ring

One of those days.

When you get to hear about all the fun stuff other people do. And wonder.... should I have checked my mail?

I'd settle for somewhere in the top 10.

I used to want more out of life.

So the joke is on me

I really am allergic to myself, and it has a name.

Autoimmune Chronic Urticaria

And it only took 3 months of scratching my skin off to figure it out. At lease it was more of a mild case.

Here is the funniest thing I read about this:
If you experience any of these, they may be clues that your chronic urticaria is autoimmune:
4. You are female

I only added the fourth one since that was the only funny one, but really now I think that is stretching it a bit.

I will update once I am done with a few weeks of pills and see if it comes back. Oh joy! At least I won't have to worry about PI while on this steroid.

Similarities

When I first got my dog I had to wrap her up in a towel and hold her while she freaked out. She bit, she snarled and fought until she was completed worn out and finally submitted to being pet and cuddled and, well, loved.

She's the sweetest dog in the world. She still freaks out in exactly the same manner when I cut her nails.

I can't help but think most relationships are like this at some point. The question is: is the person doing the loving strong enough to hold the other person until the fight has left them and they will allow it? Does the instinct to bite, scratch and claw ever leave when you don't speak the other person's language? Do you ever stop wanting to get away?

serious confusion

Men,

Someone please explain them to me. So last night I am talking to an ex. For the first hour or so we discuss the dating scene and how cougars keep trying to pick him up, not knowing that he is their age. Then we discuss inappropriate overtelling of personal information to strangers in bars. Then we discuss multiple normal things.

Then he says something about how attracted he is to me....WTF?

So I say, but you're not in love with me, so that does not matter.

Then he says he loves me....well we tell each other that all the time...I love all my friends.

So again I say but you are not IN love with me....he says don't be so sure.

Excuse me...if you are in love with me, why are we not in a relationship, why are we not having sex, WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS NOW...AFTER I HAVE GOTTEN OVER LOVING YOU.


Someone please explain the male of our species to me please.

Mondays....

"Life is hard. It's harder when you're stupid." ~ thanks J.

And seriously?

If you would stop to THINK before you open your mouth, you could save yourself a lot of headache, even if you are behaving in an incredibly stupid manner.

What is WRONG with people???

No rent

What a bummer, guess he better get a job soon. Financial aid is not reliable.